No reason what so ever....

I have no reason what so ever to be mad at eveyone in my house. Ok..I might have one or two reasons...Like they never leave me alone. I know, I am a mom...they are not supposed to leave me alone. I am supposed to be there for them and love them and cherish them and dote upon them, teach them to grow with love and support.....bullshit. Today I am just mad, and annoyed at everyone.

Which means...stay out of my way! And for any one who says......oh what a horrible mom...give me a break. You have never yelled at your kid for no reason whatsoever?? I highly doubt it.

I am just tired. My routine is shot to hell...I feel lost in my own house. We are working around eachother, working with eachother etc etc..Its just hard. I now understand my moms statement that she cannot clean when my dad is home. I so get it mom!!!

I yelled at my hubby, he yelled at me...I then informed him that it was against the rules of marriage for us both to be pissed off at the same time for no reason and that it was my turn! He's had two weeks to be annoyed at everyone, I get one day and I am gonig to use it to my fullest.

Do not say one moment when I call your name. Get up off your ass and see what I want immediately. (this is how c3 got grounded off of his computer today)

Do not stand there poking me calling my name when I am yelling at another child. Good rule of thumb..do not poke me ever!!!

do not ask a child the same question 100 times over. THIS ANNOYS ME MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF.

When I go out back to the alcove for peace and quiet, do not ask me if we can ride bikes, go to the park, go fishing, go to the store, call a friend, play catch, or set up the pool. PLEASE DO NOT ASK ME FOR ANYTHING! Today I am playing selfish mom.

WE ARE ALL ENTITLED TO PLAY SELFISH MOM.

And today is my day......

I love him tso much, but......

I think I might just kill him.

He had better get a job fast!!!

Yes I am talking about hubby. If I am standing behind you with a drink and a sandwich and ask if I can get to my computer for a few minutes, dont say, sure i'll be off in a second when you dont mean it!!!

Sandwich finished and a laundry basket folded later, he gets up! AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I know, I must be

patient
supportive
attentive
positive

I can do that if he would go away! :) dont come downstairs in the morning and argue with C1 about his lunch. A zip loc with only lunch meat in it is his lunch. Sure, I could put it between bread, but then he would only throw the bread away.

You are on my domain buddy. Shut up and ask me. ok...yes that wont work. Like when we were kids and our parents told us to keep our mouths closed but then asked us and question and yelled asnwer me! ROFL

Ok

Patience..Yes, the man is on my computer. Yes, I could hook up the other computer in the dungeon, yes, I would never see him, yes it would be quieter because he would not be yelling at all of us to be quiet when he is on the computer. my computer is on the first floor right by the kitchen where everything happens!!

OMG. I sent him to pick up C2 and NC2, NC3 and told him to park on the side street and not to go into the parking lot. he just calls and says he's in the parking lot, now what!!!???!??

I would so let out a stream of cuss words, but since my mom reads this I cannot!

Patience, deep breath..slow deep breath...I swear that man is going to drive me to drink!

*breath*
*breath*
*breath*

Scariest thing I have done in a while.....

Today I did something very scary...I went grocery shopping.

Let me clarify...on Friday, my hubby was laid off of his job. SCARY. I know that 500k people lost their jobs in the month of April alone. DAMN!

So...Here I am grocery shopping...3.29 for a box of triscuits...nope, to expensive.. I felt like crying right there in the middle of the grocery store. I shouldn't have to worry about the cost of a box of crackers!

How is a person supposed to go from security to total and complete insecurity yet still function?

C3 needs socks and shorts. Do I buy them now, or wait? I need a hair cut...do I do it now or wait. My gym shoes have holes in the, do I wait?

My hubby did get a severance..thank god..I know there are thousands of people who have not gotten this. I cannot imagine what they are going through. I never thought I could imagine what people go through during a layoff. Now I do. ITS SCARY.

We always used to say that most people are only a missed paycheck away from living out of their car. And now...we are those people. What if, after 4 months, hubby still cannot find a job? What do we do then?

Most of the news reports people losing their homes, most of them are due to their own stupidity. We have lived here for 12 years. We have been very responsible. We only have one credit card. We are not over our heads in debut..we have debt..started with our car being totaled by someone. (insurance paid us blue book..we had to come up with 11k to buy a used car still)
So we have debt, like most americans..we do not live beyond our means.

We are careful, we pay our bills.....but now....what if we can't? What if he cannot find a job for a year? I have been out of work so long that there is no way I could get anything other than retail. I dont think I would be good for retail. Someone would complain....oh boy...that would not be good..

I have total faith in my husband. I know he will find a job..I know we can provide for our families. but

what if we can't?

*************************************
later in the day, after this was posted KLP stopped by and dropped off a box of triscuits with my daugther swearing her to secrecy. Told her to say she found it on the stoop. To bad she didn't know that C2 couldn't keep a secret to save her life. Thanks KLP...Laughed my ass off!

True Love is.....

getting excited with c3 when tells about the pony he rode at a preschool field trip

brushing c2's hair to a bright sheen when you would rather cut it short to save time

throwing together last minute healthy sealed with a kiss kids lunches cause you forgot

putting laundry on hold to make pudding for an afterschool snack...(i'm laundry anal..I hate to stop)

reassuring hubby that he will get a new job because he's mega talented, when all I want to do is cry

telling c1 that his hair looks great, when in reality, it would take a miracle to flatten it out

saying with a broad grin, thank you I loved it, to a mothers day breakfast you would feed to the dogs.

telling c3 that he did a great job putting his laundry away, knowing you are going to have to somehow help him shove that one dresser drawer close

Drinking the lemonade that kids made, with extra sugar, and telling them it tastes great.

Squiriting whip cream in their mouths...just cause its really really funny

Holding c1 when his best friend yells at him and hurts his feelings

taking c2 to a mom and me tea party when i'd rather be doing anything else!!!!!

Helping C3 clean up after an accident at church (to much whip cream)

Letting C1 go...just go...ride around the neighborhood with his friends.

Tucking them all in, some with stories..and then getting up and doing it all over again the next day, and the next day, and the next day....

My Husband Was Laid Off.....

Ok...

so we thought it might happen...were even possibly happy as his boss was a world class psycho (mom avert your eyes) bitch. Of couse we never even saw it coming..we prayed it wouldn't happen
but in the end..

Hubby was laid off yesterday afternoon. Bastards waiting until after lunch to do it. Which sucks even more. If you think, but pray, its not coming, at least get it over with in the morning. Dont make a person work half a freaking day!!!!

Hubby says we will be ok. We had previous, like yesterday morning, signed up for visa's laid off protection plan. We dont have to make a payment for 2 years. Phew. Its our only credit card.
We dont have a lot of bills...but damnnnnnnnnn

So..I am, now that I am over the initial shock, kinda glad. I know..How the heck can I say that.

I can say that because we WILL NOT LOSE OUR HOUSE. Hubby got good severance and we will watch what we do. (damn...maybe I shouldn't have bought the dyson)
We will still live our lives. but a litte more carefully

Hubby is taking the weekend off. No resume building this weekend. Phew..Cause I suck as sharing my computer!!!!!

See...Hubby has had this job for a year now. He has worked 80 hours a week since he started. Yes, I know...he was grateful for a job. We used to say that all the time. We would bitch about it, then sigh and say, at least he has a job. Grin!!
But, he worked all night, every night, he worked sat and sunday. It was horrible. Yes, at least he had a job...sigh

We told Children last night. C1 cheered! What does that tell you. We all missed him. He was missing us. He had traded in his family for his career. And that is no living! Granted he could had stayed at Job 1, the one he had had since college, but we were going broke cause they were such skinflints!!! I would have had to get *shudder* job by now. :)

So..Now he is home. HUBBY...STAY OUT OF MY LAUNDRY ROOM. I wonder if I can give him a honey do list :)

I know I have to back off a little. Hubbies in general need to feel needed. I know that, I am so used to doing everything that its going to be really really hard to back off. As long as he stays out of my laundry room...I think I'll be ok.

He cut the grass last night. Hasn't dont that in a while :)

(mom dont read)

He says last night to me, so...the kids go to school at day right....and C3 goes to preschool in the afternoon....(sly grin) so like, we can get busy in the afternoons eh??

Honestly, I was not totally appaled by the idea. I haven't really seen him much in mind, body or soul, for the past year......

I think I'm gonna like him home...for a little bit,... Check my next blog to see how he's doing...If i've strangled him yet, or if he's now living on his boat :)


at least none of us are sick
at least we can still afford our house
at least we can afford food
at least we dont have the swine flu
at least he still has a jo..... sigh