Dear Mr. Superintendent
(wow...that is a tough word to spell)
our district is all out of money. You are grasping at straws.
There is talk about closing yet another school. You have canceled most fun after school activities.
You are now charging the groups that function for the school and around the school for use of the school. I guess you think that cub and girl scouts are just rolling in the dough?
Well...I have a couple of ideas for saving money.
First, crap...forgot my train of thought....
Ok...wait., I got it...
Why do the kids use throw away textbooks? Every year the district has to spend money on textbooks. Why? When we were kids we received TEXT books. That is hard cover books. The night before school, we would, ok our parents would be cussing late into the night trying to read the instructions on how to take a brown grocery bag and turn it into a book cover. Who in the world came up with those instructions anyway. So we had hard cover books..and lined paper and pencils. Someone tell me why my sixth grader needs crayons? REALLY????
We copied problems down out of the book, or off the board, wrote our names on them and turned them in. And if we destroyed or damaged a book in any way, our parents had to then pay for it and we caught hell for it. Why is this no longer sufficient? (OMG, K3 just mooned K1)...
So...get rid of the damn throw away workbooks that you have to buy every year! To me this seems like a no brainer.
Second...I now have all three of my kids in school. Why do they send home the same paperwork with each kid. Why do I have to sign three different pieces of paper telling me and them the classroom rules? Why do I have to sign three different pieces of paper first explaining about the computer lab and then giving my kids permission to use said computer lab.
Classroom rules. Why? Why in gods name must I sign a piece of paper agreeing that my kid will not be a shit, and if they are a shit they will get in trouble. Isn't that a given. Do we not know what the rules are in school by now. Do we have to be reminded each and every year. Like, what, they have changed from year to year? Why do we need a piece of paper that none of us really reads, to talk bout positive attitude and and good character. WOW...wait a minute...maybe this is what society as a whole needs. The Dist is actually ahead of the game here.....our little town is perfect because I have signed three different pieces of paper reminding me and my children how to be of good moral character. Phew...crisis avoided. So wait a minute..if one of my kids should *gasp* forget they they signed this little piece of paper promising to be a *good noodle* and gets in trouble...do they bring this little piece of paper out and wave it in our faces screaming.....BUT YOU SIGNED THIS PAPER...YOU SIGNED YOU SIGNED! Oddly enough, I know they dont do this as my perfect little children have gotten in trouble in school and I never ever saw this paper again.
I wonder if I can have the teachers sign a piece of paper promising to be of good moral character, to be nice to my kids, to teach them tons, make them all get along and be friends with everyone, to not have clicks, to not be mean, or to steal or to bully, or to name call... and if one of my kids comes home with a problem, I can go to them and scream....BUT YOU SIGNED THIS PAPER, YOU SIGNED YOU SIGNED!
I wonder if I would get a phone call from a teacher if instead of signing them, I just wrote MAKE ME!
ROFLMAO! Damn....I already signed them and turned them in. That would have been funny!!!!!
Monday, August 31, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
Dear Honey....
It has been a rough couple of months for us that is for sure. I am not sure that most couples would have been able to make it through. You have learned from your mistakes, listened to advice and taken some of it to heart.
I know that you figured 13 years of marriage was enough for you to be able to be home 24x7 and know what was going on and what to do with the children etc etc. Weren't you surprised.
I have another piece of advice for you, My Darling....
Once every 4-6 months, that lovely time of the month is really really bad. Well...more of, I am really really really really cranky the first day. Now, you haven't seen this before because you are usually at work and by the time you come home, I have hit the end of cranky stage called EXHAUSTION and am on the couch telling you to go get dinner. You were fortunate enough not to have been home all day to witness the carnage that was abound.
Our children, be it young, have learned what to do when I suddenly explode because they have once again assumed that Mom is a synonym for Maid and left their crap all over the kitchen. They quickly and very very Quietly clean it up and run for cover.
Oh...I dont even want to hear from anyone...how could you yell at the kids when its your problem kinda crap. Welcome to life, baby. I can so remember, and I can say this because my mom just left for vacation for two weeks and will not read this and call me horrified that I posted this where other people, people who know her can read this. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, and my brother and sister can testify to this...my mom would come out of her room with a bubshka on her head (bandana) white t-shirt and black shorts.....this meant trouble with a capital T. Course back then, we just knew when she came out dressed like this it was day of hell and cleaning! As we got older, we understood that if we just shut up and cleaned we would be able to escape, or run and hide later in the day. Now of course, we understand that it was that time of the month, and we tease her about it on occassion!
where was i....oh yes
My Darling.....if you suddenly see me explode and start yelling like a mad woman and the kids start scrambling around and over furniture with sponges in hand or dustbusters or vacuums, do not and I repeat do NOT say,
I know that you figured 13 years of marriage was enough for you to be able to be home 24x7 and know what was going on and what to do with the children etc etc. Weren't you surprised.
I have another piece of advice for you, My Darling....
Once every 4-6 months, that lovely time of the month is really really bad. Well...more of, I am really really really really cranky the first day. Now, you haven't seen this before because you are usually at work and by the time you come home, I have hit the end of cranky stage called EXHAUSTION and am on the couch telling you to go get dinner. You were fortunate enough not to have been home all day to witness the carnage that was abound.
Our children, be it young, have learned what to do when I suddenly explode because they have once again assumed that Mom is a synonym for Maid and left their crap all over the kitchen. They quickly and very very Quietly clean it up and run for cover.
Oh...I dont even want to hear from anyone...how could you yell at the kids when its your problem kinda crap. Welcome to life, baby. I can so remember, and I can say this because my mom just left for vacation for two weeks and will not read this and call me horrified that I posted this where other people, people who know her can read this. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, and my brother and sister can testify to this...my mom would come out of her room with a bubshka on her head (bandana) white t-shirt and black shorts.....this meant trouble with a capital T. Course back then, we just knew when she came out dressed like this it was day of hell and cleaning! As we got older, we understood that if we just shut up and cleaned we would be able to escape, or run and hide later in the day. Now of course, we understand that it was that time of the month, and we tease her about it on occassion!
where was i....oh yes
My Darling.....if you suddenly see me explode and start yelling like a mad woman and the kids start scrambling around and over furniture with sponges in hand or dustbusters or vacuums, do not and I repeat do NOT say,
- what is your problem
- why are you yelling
- why are you so cranky
- why dont you go somewhere
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Would prison be easier?
I wonder...ok yes, I wonder about odd things...but I think that prison would be easier than life right now..No, not my life....relax mom!
Think of it.. Here we are struggling like millions of Americans that have lost their jobs for one reason or another.
We would be fed, and since from what I hear, working in the kitchen is a coveted job, and me being a fresh fish, I wouldn't have to cook or server or clean up after it! Them meals would not be the best of course, but hey, I didn't have to do anything! AND...if I was in solitary, they would bring to food to me! I wouldn't even have to get up!
If I needed clothes, they would provide them for me. I dont have to pay for them! Granted they are not the best looking clothes in the world, but this saves having to decide what t-shirt to wear that day. Granted I cannot stand flip flops, but I think gym shoes are allowed aren't they? Maybe with no shoe laces.
Housing...well that is a given. The courts proclaim that I would have to be housed humanley. My basic needs must be met. I must have a roof over my head, electricity etc. I dont have to fix anything. If the sink backs up, they come and fix and I dont have to sit there watching the clock seeing $82 flying out the window with each tick of the clock. That is more than some people. I have a neighbor who has had no electricty for most of the summer.. Convicts are currently living better than her family right now.
Should I or my husband decide to learna new trade to get back into the job market, we would have to come up with thousands of dollars. We dont have that. However, If I was in jail, I would have access to free education. I could learn a trade! And I wouldn't have to pay for it.
If I got sick, or hurt, I would be taken to the Dr. or even the Hospital and not have to worry about the bill. Right now, one quarter of our unemployment each month goes to insurance. If we were in jail, it would be free! Hell, I could even get cosmetic surgery in jail for free. Not that I think I need any work mind you...I am perfect as I am thank you very much! Its just the idea of it.
Granted, I could not come and go as I pleased...but wait...I cannot afford to do that now. I could not wear what I wanted...oh...cannot afford that either..
I would get to do a job...a small, minor job, maybe a librarian, you need a degree to do that in the outside..that costs money. On the inside, I think you just have to pay someone off, or maybe be someones bitch??!? Granted you only make change a day, but, I dont think they have to pay taxes on that do they? Would fica take a percentage out of .42 cents an hour?
so, lets recap
Food: Outside-watching the budget, skimping when possible, skipped buying bacon this week
Inside: They server me, clean up, no worries about cost..
Shelter: Outside- hope we are able to keep our house if we are unemployed for longer than 1 year
Inside: No worries there. All taken care of, Maintenance included!
Medial: Outside...lordy...where do I start
inside: Keep me healthy to continue to punish me! AWESOME
Work: Outside....Jobs...where...does someone have a job somewhere?
Inside.... May not pay much...but at least its work right? No experience requried.
is it just me, or is there something just wrong here?
Think of it.. Here we are struggling like millions of Americans that have lost their jobs for one reason or another.
We would be fed, and since from what I hear, working in the kitchen is a coveted job, and me being a fresh fish, I wouldn't have to cook or server or clean up after it! Them meals would not be the best of course, but hey, I didn't have to do anything! AND...if I was in solitary, they would bring to food to me! I wouldn't even have to get up!
If I needed clothes, they would provide them for me. I dont have to pay for them! Granted they are not the best looking clothes in the world, but this saves having to decide what t-shirt to wear that day. Granted I cannot stand flip flops, but I think gym shoes are allowed aren't they? Maybe with no shoe laces.
Housing...well that is a given. The courts proclaim that I would have to be housed humanley. My basic needs must be met. I must have a roof over my head, electricity etc. I dont have to fix anything. If the sink backs up, they come and fix and I dont have to sit there watching the clock seeing $82 flying out the window with each tick of the clock. That is more than some people. I have a neighbor who has had no electricty for most of the summer.. Convicts are currently living better than her family right now.
Should I or my husband decide to learna new trade to get back into the job market, we would have to come up with thousands of dollars. We dont have that. However, If I was in jail, I would have access to free education. I could learn a trade! And I wouldn't have to pay for it.
If I got sick, or hurt, I would be taken to the Dr. or even the Hospital and not have to worry about the bill. Right now, one quarter of our unemployment each month goes to insurance. If we were in jail, it would be free! Hell, I could even get cosmetic surgery in jail for free. Not that I think I need any work mind you...I am perfect as I am thank you very much! Its just the idea of it.
Granted, I could not come and go as I pleased...but wait...I cannot afford to do that now. I could not wear what I wanted...oh...cannot afford that either..
I would get to do a job...a small, minor job, maybe a librarian, you need a degree to do that in the outside..that costs money. On the inside, I think you just have to pay someone off, or maybe be someones bitch??!? Granted you only make change a day, but, I dont think they have to pay taxes on that do they? Would fica take a percentage out of .42 cents an hour?
so, lets recap
Food: Outside-watching the budget, skimping when possible, skipped buying bacon this week
Inside: They server me, clean up, no worries about cost..
Shelter: Outside- hope we are able to keep our house if we are unemployed for longer than 1 year
Inside: No worries there. All taken care of, Maintenance included!
Medial: Outside...lordy...where do I start
inside: Keep me healthy to continue to punish me! AWESOME
Work: Outside....Jobs...where...does someone have a job somewhere?
Inside.... May not pay much...but at least its work right? No experience requried.
is it just me, or is there something just wrong here?
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