Would prison be easier?

I wonder...ok yes, I wonder about odd things...but I think that prison would be easier than life right now..No, not my life....relax mom!

Think of it.. Here we are struggling like millions of Americans that have lost their jobs for one reason or another.

We would be fed, and since from what I hear, working in the kitchen is a coveted job, and me being a fresh fish, I wouldn't have to cook or server or clean up after it! Them meals would not be the best of course, but hey, I didn't have to do anything! AND...if I was in solitary, they would bring to food to me! I wouldn't even have to get up!

If I needed clothes, they would provide them for me. I dont have to pay for them! Granted they are not the best looking clothes in the world, but this saves having to decide what t-shirt to wear that day. Granted I cannot stand flip flops, but I think gym shoes are allowed aren't they? Maybe with no shoe laces.

Housing...well that is a given. The courts proclaim that I would have to be housed humanley. My basic needs must be met. I must have a roof over my head, electricity etc. I dont have to fix anything. If the sink backs up, they come and fix and I dont have to sit there watching the clock seeing $82 flying out the window with each tick of the clock. That is more than some people. I have a neighbor who has had no electricty for most of the summer.. Convicts are currently living better than her family right now.

Should I or my husband decide to learna new trade to get back into the job market, we would have to come up with thousands of dollars. We dont have that. However, If I was in jail, I would have access to free education. I could learn a trade! And I wouldn't have to pay for it.

If I got sick, or hurt, I would be taken to the Dr. or even the Hospital and not have to worry about the bill. Right now, one quarter of our unemployment each month goes to insurance. If we were in jail, it would be free! Hell, I could even get cosmetic surgery in jail for free. Not that I think I need any work mind you...I am perfect as I am thank you very much! Its just the idea of it.

Granted, I could not come and go as I pleased...but wait...I cannot afford to do that now. I could not wear what I wanted...oh...cannot afford that either..

I would get to do a job...a small, minor job, maybe a librarian, you need a degree to do that in the outside..that costs money. On the inside, I think you just have to pay someone off, or maybe be someones bitch??!? Granted you only make change a day, but, I dont think they have to pay taxes on that do they? Would fica take a percentage out of .42 cents an hour?

so, lets recap

Food: Outside-watching the budget, skimping when possible, skipped buying bacon this week
Inside: They server me, clean up, no worries about cost..

Shelter: Outside- hope we are able to keep our house if we are unemployed for longer than 1 year
Inside: No worries there. All taken care of, Maintenance included!

Medial: Outside...lordy...where do I start
inside: Keep me healthy to continue to punish me! AWESOME

Work: Outside....Jobs...where...does someone have a job somewhere?
Inside.... May not pay much...but at least its work right? No experience requried.


is it just me, or is there something just wrong here?

A Heart felt note to .....

my underwear...

Dear Underwear,

You are an afterthought in my world. I acknowledge that. I dont take care in purchasing you, I dont take care in washing you. You get thrown in the was the rest, not on a delicate cycle or with special soap.

Maybe you are resentful of this. Millions of women spend millions of dollars on underwear. They spend just as much in the care of the underwear. There are more colors of underwear than in the rainbow. There are more styles than I can even imagine or understand.

I am boring underwear person. I get that, you should know that by now. I buy you at walmart, try to give you a good home. Ok..I will take a little more care of you if that is what you want..
I'm not into colors cause if I wear white pants or shorts, I dont want to think about you. I just want to go! Same reason all of my bras are boring and white. I dont want to think..I dont have time to think.

But, I will try. I wills till buy you at walmart, but maybe I will buy some light pastel colors? Maybe I'll wash you on delicate..I'll try to give you some more thought...but you have to give me something in return. I am not asking for much....

But

Please, oh please, stop giving me super wedgies in public!

A note to my darling Children

STOP!

Stop asking me questions
Stop asking me the same questions
Stop asking me dumb question
stop asking me if you can have a popsicle
stop asking me if you can eat jelly with a spoon
Stop asking if you can have pretzels
Stop asking if you can call so and so
stop asking if you can go to a friends house
stop asking if you can eat
stop asking if you can watch tv
stop asking if you can ride your bike to the store
stop asking if you friends can come over
stop asking if you can have pretzels (he just asked for a third time)
Stop asking for money
stop asking for things you can find yourself.
stop asking if I have so and so 's phone number (i said no the first time you asked)
stop asking where your shoes are(like my mother when I was a child, I dont wear them and if you put them back where they belong you would be wearing them now, wouldn't you)
Stop asking when is dinner, you just ate lunch!
Stop asking if you can feed the dogs
stop asking if you can feed the bird
stop asking each other questions
Stop asking to be entertained by me

When we were kids, we were never entertained by our parents. We were kicked out of the house in the summer as soon as we were potty trained and told to go play. Come home for lunch, dinner and when the street lights come on.

We have a backyard, we have a fort, we have a sandbox. Find some sticks and rocks and string and build something. Play with something, invent something, but please, oh please, leave me out of it because I dont know where the string is and I didn't use the scissors last, so please dont ask me!

How are we supposed to smile

it is just getting worse and worse. How am I, how is anyone, supposed to put on a happy face and continue to function day to day? The world is falling apart around our ears and we are supposed to ignore it and continue on our merry way.

I cannot do this. I try, I try to not read the news...I try not not listen to the news, to not look up the news, but it keeps finding me.

Obama's healthcare. Ok...A good thing? I'm not sure. Being in the boat of possibly not having health care soon and needing it, maybe a good thing. But, reports out of Britian show a 6 month waiting list to see a dr for arthritis. Or the incredible day long waiting in hosptial ers in Canada. Is this what we are to expect? I have no idea and it scares the hell out of me. So, my daughter breaks her leg but there are 12 guys having heartattacks in front of us, so we wait two days in the waiting room?

Our economy is falling apart, but, the University of Illinois/Chicago has won a $3Million dollar grant to study the drinking habits of Lesbians. WHO THE HELL CARES! Three million dollars. It makes me want to call the woman who is the head of this study and say, REALLY????

The news people are upset that some study was not released six years ago stating the dangers of driving while talking. OMG! If only they had released that study, there would be more people alive today! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!

Woman in GB, looses a lawsuit against her cleaning company. Claims they did an inadequate job clearing out spiders of her garage, and one startled her causing her to fall and break her wrist.

46 yr old woman sentenced to prison for having sex with 13yr old. Sigh

Cops show up to deal with domestic dispute, man throws 18month old into the bushes to hide him. Sigh..

California

Its July and the high this weekend will not even make it out of the 70's.

I am cancelling my newspaper and deleting my news tab from firefox. I am swearing off news. I just dont think I can take it anymore. Even Ben & Jerry are not helping.

Is this hiding my head in the sand....why yes, yes it is, but for my own mental sanity....OMG OMG

Fox is on the in the background....commercial for news program...lady says to man, so you came face to face with your sons killer, what was his demenior like!

Why? Why? Is this so we can feel better about ourselves, that we are not in their shoes. That our lives are not as horrible as theirs? Is this why we watch the jerry springers? To make ourselves feel better? Oh...that poor child got shot while washinger her dog...so glad its not my kid. So glad we dont live in that neighborhood.

Why is this on the evening news? Is it news? or is it simply to say, oh how horrible. or, so glad its not me, we dont live there...or is it simply to depress the hell out of us.

They dont report the news...no one does anymore...they report what they want us to feel.
Well...thanks guys..I feel like shit....and I done!

Why are we forced to flaunt it?

My GF went to Country Thunder last night, its a big country concert with a bunch of drunks and good music, in case you were wondering. Well, Taylor Swift was playing. I had wanted to bring my daughter to see her as she things she is wonderful, but in light of my hubbys recent layoff, that became impossible. And I am not glad that I didn't take her.

According to my GF, Taylor Swift, who I believe is barely legal, was thrashing, writhing, arching, crawling, etc, all over the stage.

This leaves me to wonder...just what the hell is going on here. She is barely legal, acting like a sex kitten, on a stage, while thousands of drunk and thanks to her, horny men, are lusting over her.

REALLY???? She's what? 18? Maybe 19? Are you kidding me! If my daughter was 18 and I caught her acting that way, I would knock her brains back into her head. I would imagine that most Dads would have a heartattack if they caught their little girls acting like this.

If you are driving in the 'wrong' part of town and see an obvioulsy very young girl walking a street corner, acting like a sex kitten, dont you feel bad for her, sorry that her life has turned out this way.

But at a concert, you pay over $100 dollars a ticket to watch it?

If a crowd of guys gathered around the young girl and started yelling and lusting and offering her 100$ to watch, wouldn't they all be arrested?

Woudln't the girl be offered help?

So, why is this young lady, crawling around a stage and grown adults are paying $100 a ticket to cheer her on and its accepted?

Not to mention all of the young girls that were brought there by their parents to see this show. Why? Why is this what they are being taught? Why is this the way to be successful? To get men to like you, you have to crawl around on the stage? To be popular you have to wear next to nothing and act like a sex kitten?

Male performers dont do this. They dont crawl around on the stage, arching their backs, throwing their hair around, (cept maybe the 80's hair bands). Male performs strut around in tight clothing, tons of bling, grab their packages, and tell what they will do to their bitches etc.

yes, I know, not all male performs and not all female performs. Leave me alone, I'm ranting!

Tell you what. Men seem to want sex kittens..What do women want...

I'll pay $1000 dollars a ticket to see any guy on stage wearing an apron, pushing a vacuum and singing about how hard it is to bath one child, while one is throwing up from the stomach flu, and dinner is burning, and spouse will be home any minute, and the hot water heater is on the fritz, the air conditioner broke, you haven't showered in days, etc etc etc

That's what I want to see. Not some idiot who doesn't even know how to balance a checkbook, grab his crotch and scream about his ho.

Or some barely legal child crawling around on the stage because she has been rasied, like the rest of us girls, ladies, that you have to be perfect and flaunt it to get anywhere.

Would anyone go to her concert, if she showed up in a nice outfit and simply played her songs?

Just wondering....

Today I dropped c2 off at a friends house. it is one of the bigger houses in town. Actually, when you cross the street by us, the houses jump in size and tax bracket. We live on the older side of town. The old houses, with the full grown trees! the beautiful streets lined with Full Grown Trees. My house was built in 1972. It has a one car garage. It is a tri level. it is not big enough for my family...but is it? Growing up didn't we all share a room with a sibling? Didn't we all have to fight over the bathroom, or the one tv. My boys share a room. They will share a room until one of them moves out. My grandparents shared beds with their siblings. BEDS! We always said that my grandmother had such wonderful skin because she slept on her back her entire life. Mainly, because growing up and sharing a bed with two yes TWO other sisters, she learned not to move. My dad and his brother shared a bed until my dad went to college.

So...my boys share a room. We all share one full bathroom. I know it will get crazy when they are older and need face time with themselves :) We dont have a basement. We have creative storage. We dont have a formal dining room. We have a kitchen table. Granted it seats 10 which I love, but no formal dining room. Hell, who uses it anyway! I dont even have a living room...oh wait..maybe I do. The downstairs is the family room, where the family never gathers..the upstairs has a couch and two chairs almost on top of the giant kitchen table. I would say, the three separate areas of my first floor, kitchen, eating area, living room are smaller than the local gas station convience store. My house is small by todays standards. But, its cozy? Comfy? well loved, and lived.

I keep it clean, as much as I care to :) (sorry mom), I keep it updated as much as I can afford to. you would be amazed at the things you can find at second hand stores! I love my house. yes, its loud..crowded at times, to small most of the time, and there are things I might do to it if I could, but I love my house.

I do feel overshadowed by some of my children's friends. The ones that live in the 350K homes, the ones that live in the million dollar plus homes. You know the ones, The brick homes that are to big. That have the valuted ceilings.

Do I even have a point here? I dont know. Why do I feel intimidated by someone elses good fortune? Wait, intimidated is not the word. Jealous? I dont think so? Inadequate? Maybe? Not sure.

What is a home vrs what is a house? My brother has moved from house to house, but does he have a home? Is his current house home? My sister has finally found a home. Do people who live in, vaulted ceilings, triple the tax bill, complaining about the cost of heating and cooling, sparsley decorated, have a home or a house? Why have the beautiful outside if you cannot afford to have an inside?

Why is having huge houses with so many rooms that you dont know where your kids are or what they are doing, better than having your kids sleeping in the same room, learning to get along, to deal with the daily intrusion into their lives?

Why do the kids have tv's in their bedrooms, next to their computes. Why dont we want to be around them. We seem to be creating ways to get rid of them, to keep them out of the family part of the house?

What happened to going on drives and making up games. Now we drive to walmart and put a movie in for the five minute drive. Why dont we want to hear them. Why dont we want them interacting with eachother. dont get me wrong...C2 complained the other day that c3 was breathing his air in the car. But...isn't that part of growing up and learning to deal.

They no longer have to live with eacother. They co exist. Pass each other on the way to the fridge. We are building giant houses so that we cannot find each other. We dont konw what is going on in our own houses. We give our kids unlimited access to tv with a zillion channels and never check what they are watching. We put comptuers in their rooms with unlimited access to the most horrible, scary, abusive, dangerous things/people out there.

Why do we want them to go away..to be quiet, to not fight, to not learn to live, to get along, to compromise?

So, I do sometimes feel intimidated by someone elses house, by the quiet because the kids are all in their own worlds not communicating with the rest of the their family. Jealous even, of the quiet....cause as a mom, isn't that all we really want, is quiet...but Isn't it just as important for us to be quiet and listen to our kids.

Stop hiding them from eachother, let them fight, argue, and learn.

I wonder, some of the greatest minds are our generation or our parents generation. Computers, cell phones, technology in general. Did Jobs or Gates share a room with a sibling, or a bathroom with the family. My god..how did they survive with only one tv in the house.

What are we taking away from our kids by giving them so much? Stop hiding and start dealing, teaching, guiding. Just keep the advil handy :)

I received a letter

Today...I received a letter from a financial group...Here is my response. I x'd out their name cause in todays day and age...you never know who might sue you :) And...being on a fixed income...we couldn't afford to be sued.

Mr. XXXXX

Thank you for your letter dated June 26, 2009.

We continue to face difficult times as Americans. Our country is suffering from a severe economic crisis, millions unemployed, my family being one of them. Our soldiers are fighting thousands of miles from home. We are under the threat of a missile launch on that sacred day, July 4th. Businesses are failing, houses are being foreclosed upon, families face uncertain futures.

And then, I receive you letter titled, What Constitutes an American?

Really? So tell me. How much did xxxxx Financial Group spend to send out letters telling me to remember our fallen and to be proud of our country?

I am glad to say that we do not invest through your company. I would hate to think of my hard earned money being spent by xxxxx Financial Group in sending out letters telling people to be proud of their country. Isn't there a better way to invest the money that your customers entrust to you?

I would understand a letter offering your services...that is simple marketing. This? I have no idea what this is? Is this supposed to be a back door marketing tactic? Am I supposed to read this letter, feel the pride swell in my chest and say, I should invest with xxxxx Financial Group.

Really?

Sincerely

Sharon Miller
A proud American even before your letter told me I should be.